Marian Rosado, Psy.D
Part 3 of 3 - Three things I've Learned From My Daughters' Illness and the Prayers That Sustained Me
Updated: Oct 22, 2019
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It's okay to ask for help
It's very normal to feel alone, or as if no one else understands the toll this daily battle can have on your child and you as parents. It's also reasonable to experience difficulty connecting with others. Some parents, myself included, have wished to hit the pause button of life in order sense of the situation and emotions. Be encouraged parents - you are not alone!
This battle is not meant to be fought alone. Nonetheless, when confronted with fatigue, it's exactly what we want to do - retreat, be alone, and at times give in to the fears. However, when fatigue sets in, this is precisely the time you should phone a friend, talk to your Pastor or church leader, and ask for prayer, or seek supportive counseling.
For many parents, their child's illness could be ongoing. Seeking emotional and faith-based support is part of the process. As a psychologist, I frequently hear my clients say - "I'm not crazy. I'm just going through a lot right now." Remember, that a psychologist's job is not to judge you, but to be an objective observer and helper. I often share the following thought with my clients: a neurosurgeon should not perform surgery on themselves (at least it's not advisable) no matter how much knowledge or experience they have. Take me; for example, it does not matter how much knowledge I have as a psychologist; I could not self apply the knowledge to heal myself from this journey. Instead, I reach out to my friends, family, church family, and other colleagues. I encourage you to reach out as well; ask for prayer, ask someone to listen to your concerns.
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Also, if you have a minimal support system, I encourage you to join a support group at your local hospital. They tend to be free of charge. Ask your treatment team for resources or go directly to the hospital's website. You could also look at any national/state/local associations that may provide additional resources.
We are not meant to be our healers. More importantly, it's not advisable to leave God out of the equation. He is your ultimate counselor.
Remember, we are not meant to be our healers. More importantly, it's not advisable to leave God out of the equation. He is your ultimate counselor.
Dear God, I sometimes don't have the words to pray over this situation. So I will use your promises, Lord. You say, "I am the Lord your God. I am holding your hand, so don't be afraid. I am here to help you." (Isaiah 41:13 CEV). Thank you, Lord, that I could rely on your help. Lord, as I sit in silence, search my heart, my mind, and soul and bring peace. God, I've asked you many times to bring healing; as I wait for your will - please give me the courage to be the parent my child needs me to be. Thank you, Jesus, and please forgive my unbelief, frustration, and fears. May your will always be done and help me to accept it. Amen.
Read “Finding Hope After Losing a Child
Back to part 2 of 3: Trusting God
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Disclaimer: The content shared in this page is intended as general advice only, and not to replace clinical counseling, medical treatment, legal counsel, or pastoral guidance.